Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings. — Psalm 63:7
God has given me the great privilege and awesome responsibility to be a father to two sons and two daughters.
One day my youngest, then seven, came into my office crying. Through her sobs I could make out that she and her brother were fighting, that it seemed to her that her mom had taken her brother’s side.
As a father and as a man working out of my home office, I have several choices.
I could have told her I was busy, that I had important work to do and she would need to talk to me later. Many dads would do that, arguing that she needs to learn that she’s not the center of the universe.
I could tell her that her mom and I are one, that I’m going to take the same position that my wife took. Many dads would do that, understanding that children must not manipulate their parents and try to use one against the other.
I could have picked apart the situation and tried to arrive at who was to blame for the fight and what moral principles were broken to cause a fight. After all, I am the moral coach of my children; I need to teach them the difference between right and wrong.
I could have taught her some conflict management skills. Certainly, she will be navigating through conflict all her life — she needs to learn those skills.
But I didn’t do any of those things that day. Instead, I just held her, and rocked back and forth in my office chair. I sensed that this really wasn’t about who was at fault in the fight, or about whether she was whining or interrupting or manipulating. Instead, this was a little girl asking her daddy where she stood in the universe. Was she important enough to be heard? Would someone bigger and stronger than her absorb all these overwhelming emotions that she felt and offer her gentle comfort and peace?
God, of course, is much, much better Father than I am. He always knows exactly what we need. Sometimes we go to Him bewildered by a life that suddenly got out of hand, too big, too scary, too unfair for us to manage. Sometimes we don’t even know how to ask Him the question we need answered. But that’s all right. He knows. He always knows what to do.
I held my daughter for three or four minutes. Pretty soon she was giggling about something. The storm was over. She hopped off my lap and went her way.
Be encouraged!
Dwight
Dwight Clough is the author of four Christian books and is an active member of Lake City Church in Madison. This devotional is also available via email and you may review the archives back to 2002. To contact Dwight or Kim, use their contact form. You may also support their ministry.